Farewell Talk

Today I was asked to give a talk based on Elder Jorge M. Alvarado talk: “After the Trial of Our Faith” combined with how I got to where I am right now. 

My name is Hailey Deeds. I have been called to serve as a full time missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I have been called to serve in the Montana Billings Mission and I report to the Provo MTC Feb 12. 

Heavenly Father must have known that I needed a talk like this because under this manly exterior I’m honestly freaking out inside. My first recollection of the missionaries was back when I was 5 and two elders came into our house. They asked me if I wanted to see a game. They took their ties, bunched them all the way to the top, and waited for my que to “go.” Once I gave my signal, they both let go of their tie and yelled, “It’s a tie!” That light hearted joke has stuck with me these past 14 years. Life hasn’t always been easy and I don’t imagine it changing anytime soon. But something that these elders taught me was that life didn’t have to be easy to faithfully walk with joy. 

Elder Alvarado stated, “No matter the obstacles we face in life, we can trust that Jesus Christ will prepare a way forward as we walk with faith. God has promised that all who live according to the covenants they have made with Him will, in His time, receive all His promised blessings.” Elder Jeffrey R. Holland taught, “Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don’t come until heaven; but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come.”1

The biggest example I have of this concept is my Uncle Darby. In 2016, my Uncle Darby passed away from cancer. He was my best friend. He didn’t have a wife or kids, but it didn’t stop him from parenting me. And up until the day that he couldn’t do anything, I sat at the foot of his bed reading scriptures to him. Right on the left of his bed was a photo of George Washington giving a prayer at Valley Forge. The picture reads, “I consider it an indispensable duty to close this last solemn act of my official life by commending the interests of our dearest country to the protection of almighty God.” And similarly, my Uncle did the same. He closed out the last portion of his life with faith and prayer that our family would be watched over and blessed- and we were. I know that my Uncle is probably meeting his soul mate as we speak. He didn’t receive all the blessings in this life, but he was faithful, and so I know they will come. He knew that too. 

Moroni taught that “faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.”2

If you know me at all, which most of you do, you know that usually I have my summers planned out five summers in advanced. This might be excessive, but Elder Alvarado teaches that we should be striving for the end in mind. So really I’m just following the counsel of our leaders. 

Elder Alvarado stated, “The end for which each of us strives is to be endowed with power in a house of the Lord, sealed as families, faithful to covenants made in a temple that qualify us for the greatest gift of God—that of eternal life. The ordinances of the temple and the covenants you make there are key to strengthening your life, your marriage and family, and your ability to resist the attacks of the adversary. Your worship in the temple and your service there for your ancestors will bless you with increased personal revelation and peace and will fortify your commitment to stay on the covenant path.”3

These past four months, I have been living in Orlando, Florida. I had the privilege of being a temple worker in the Orlando temple. One experience stuck with me that I even wrote it down. 

“Hey! I want to tell you about a cool experience I had at the temple today. Today they placed me in charge of the youth center because we had a sealing to parent. A lil girl by the name of Bella came in. She is three years old. She and her mom are both from the Philippines. Her mom just got married to an American guy and they had 90 days to make it official before they sent her back. At first Bella cried and cried but finally after a bit she warmed up to me. She just wanted her ‘daddy’. I thought that was so cute. Bella was such a handful but I had the absolute best time running around and playing Minnie and Mickey with her. I think I’m the only temple worker able to do that still...run that is hehe. She even let me hold her hand to the sealing room. There was only four others in the sealing room and because I helped Bella I got to watch. It made me tear up. It was so special to see this family get sealed together forever. It was even more special to be reminded that family is much larger than blood. I’m obviously adopted and had to do the sealing to parent. That ordinance makes everything real. It’s as if it changes your dna a bit to unite the family even more. I love my family and I know Bella will be blessed by both her parents. 

This example of my parents still influences my life today. Their example taught me the why of gospel doctrine and helped me to understand the meaning, purpose, and blessings that the gospel brings. Understanding the why of the gospel of Jesus Christ can also help us face our trials with faith.

My mother first learned about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints when she was only 14. Her guy friend was telling her about a girl in his class. This girl was super smart, top of class, could go to any college of her choosing, but he was perplexed because all she wanted to do was to have a family. He explained “She is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I just don’t understand.” My mother did though. Little did she know that years later, she’d meet a dapper gentleman who would take her on a date and during that date he’d be wearing a BYU sweatshirt. My mom, however, wanted her conversion to be her own. She met with the missionaries secretly and decided for herself that this was the true gospel. 

My birth mother had a similar story. In high school, my birth mother made friends with a group of LDS kids. They took her to activities, girl camp, and showed her love the best ways they could. At age 17, she gained a witness that this church was in fact true and was baptized; only member in her family. 

My dad’s mom claims her story is quite simple, but every conversion is unique. They were visiting their family in SLC and were invited to attend our church’s Easter Sunday. She doesn’t remember a lot from the service now, but she remembers the feeling. They attended usually the closest Protestant church, but as soon as they got home, the missionaries came to their door. My grandma was pregnant with her third child. She wanted to join but at the time, your husband had to allow it. The missionaries continued to come over and she was able to convince my grandpa to allow her to join. 

She says, “That was 58 years ago and it was one of the most important decisions I’ve ever made.” 

Without any of these women, I wouldn’t be where I am today. They have taught me that this gospel is based off the principles of family, discipleship, and love. Walking on the covenant path has a bigger impact than we might think. People are constantly watching. I doubt that 14 year old girl who told my mom’s friend that family was more important to her actually knew that my mother would later join the church because of her example. My family has taught me that everyone goes through their own conversion and choosing to follow Jesus Christ will be the most important decision we ever make. 

Parents the influence you have on our children is more powerful as they see you walking faithfully on the covenant path. The Book of Mormon prophet Jacob is an example of such righteousness. His son Enos wrote of the impact of his father’s teachings:

“They had been taught by their mothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them.

“And they rehearsed unto me the words of their mothers, saying: We do not doubt our mothers knew it.”9

Elder Alvarado stated, ‘Ultimately, everything God invites and commands us to do is an expression of His love for us and His desire to give us the blessings reserved for the faithful.”

On June 12, 2018 - I wrote a blog post about my feelings towards serving a mission. 

“As I sit in my bed, crying my eyes out, I am overwhelmed with the knowledge that I know without a doubt I’m supposed to serve a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

I have always felt prompted to serve a mission when I turn 19, but recently it's been difficult to understand how I'll be able to. Usually I don't let a thing like this bother me, but I've been scared that my lupus is going to get in the way. Just the other day, I was mowing the lawn in the Missouri heat and felt like I was so weak that I could've passed out. The other day I went on a three mile bike ride and afterwards, I threw up. The only thing keeping me going in both pursuits was the mindset, 'How am I going to handle a mission if I can't handle this?'

I have been so worried I'm going to get a flare when I'm in the field and have to be sent home. 

Missions have always secretly scared me. Maybe it was the fear of missing out or the general thought that people will forget me or the idea that I won't be able to handle the challenges thrown at me when I'm out in the field. But tonight, all worries were calmed. I feel peace. Heavenly Father has called me to serve and instead of being out of service, I'm going to answer with a 'How may I be of service?'”

There is a song that I listen to called 'He Believes in You' and the words speak to me on a personal level.

'Though it's been hard and you've come so far, you can be so much more. He believes in you. The future is bright. 'Cause He knows you will do great things with your life. He'll take your hopes and your dreams and multiply them by two. 'Cause He believes...He believes in you.'

'You know what you want and you think you know best. You plan out your life and take a few steps. Oh but when it's not working and you wanna turn back, you'll see firsthand that He has something planned so much bigger than that.'

These lyrics have helped me better understand God's divine plan for me. I don't have to worry about not being capable. Heavenly Father has it covered.

It's like the scripture verse Jeremiah 29:11. 'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'

Let us all walk with a little bit more faith in our good and bad days. Heavenly Father will always see us through.